Marriage isn’t easy – even for those who are “doing it right.” As the author of marriage, God intended for our companionship, flourishing, and homes to bring Him glory. But how do we know if our marriage is glorifying to God? How can we know if, as a couple, we are healthy and doing well?

To help you gauge both, I’ve prepared a brief marriage report card. It’s a simple way to take inventory of where your marriage is. Be aware: many of these diagnostic statements are about your spouse. So, for this to work well, you need to both complete it honestly. Grade each statement. Then each category overall.

After you both complete it, make plans to go to dinner or somewhere by yourself and compare. Talk. Pray. Then, set some achievable goals to improve those areas that need it. The point of this “report card” is not to fix anything, but to shed light on areas that you need to can talk about, pray about, and work on. Every marriage – even Christian ones – can use a tune-up. Why not start today?

(For a printable/digital PDF version, click here.)

Grade Scale

A = This area is wonderful and I could not be more satisfied.

B = This area is quite good but there’s always room for growth.

C = This area is okay yet I want us to improve some things.

D = This area is not good and we need to work on it now.

F = This area is critical and is damaging out relationship badly.

 

SPIRITUAL LIFE                                                                     Overall Grade: _____

_____      Jesus is Lord of our marriage.

_____      The time we spend reading the Bible and praying together is healthy.

_____      I admire my spouse’s priority for and involvement in church.

_____      We discuss what the Lord is teaching us and keep each other accountable.

_____      My spouse and I look for ways to serve and help other couples.

 

COMMUNICATION                                                              Overall Grade: _____

_____      I find it easy to ask for forgiveness from my spouse.

_____      When we disagree, our conversations are still uplifting and respectful.

_____      I feel like my views/opinions are heard, considered, and factored in.

_____      I can share my deepest thoughts and feelings with my spouse.

_____      My spouse regularly says, “Thank You” for what I do in our home.

_____      We communicate well – especially in being honest and open.

_____      In times of stress, our marriage is a comfort and support to me.

_____      We set aside a good amount of time to talk together.

 

ROLES & EXPECTATIONS                                                    Overall Grade: _____

_____      My spouse does his/her fair share of household chores or jobs.

_____      I clearly understand what my spouse expects of me in day-to-day situations.

_____      I am willing to invest time and money into improving our marriage.

_____      I am committed to doing whatever it takes to make our marriage work.

_____      My spouse strives to fulfill their Ephesians 5 role (as Christ or the church).

 

LOVE & SEX                                                                           Overall Grade: _____

_____      My spouse loves me in many practical and tangible ways.

_____      I feel valued by, cherished by, and important to my spouse.

_____      We surprise each other with occasion gifts or unexpected attention.

_____      We laugh, have fun, and enjoy each other’s company.

_____      Sex is a regular and satisfying part of our marriage.

_____      Our sexual desires are compatible.

_____      We discuss our sexual preferences and priorities freely and well.

 

FAMILY & PARENTING                                                        Overall Grade: _____

_____      My marriage is one of the most important things in my life.

_____      Our in-laws (and extended family) have a healthy role in our marriage.

_____      I feel supported by my spouse when I make a parenting decision.

_____      We have a clear, agreed upon plan for how to discipline our kids.

 

FINANCES & FUTURE                                                          Overall Grade: _____

_____      I like our short-term and long-term financial goals.

_____      I trust my spouse’s spending habits.

_____      My spouse exhibits a healthy ambition and work ethic.

_____      I look forward to our future together.

(For a printable/digital PDF version, click here.)